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Choosing Our Breast Reconstruction Surgery
(breast reconstruction after mastectomy)

Shauna had a double mastectomy, while Rosalina had a unilateral mastectomy in 2021. Both had to wait six months post-radiation to get their “final” reconstruction surgery. For Shauna, this was the last thing on her list that she needed to check off. She was ecstatic, overjoyed, and looking forward to getting new foobs. Rosalina felt the opposite. She was frazzled and mentally drained from all her research and meeting with her plastic surgeon four or five times to ask more questions and devise a final plan.

Resources

Transcript

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Hey, TYFTS listeners, it’s Rosalina and we are in the second to last episode of season

 

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two.

 

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Thank you for riding this journey with us and supporting our podcasts.

 

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We need your feedback.

 

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Please take five minutes every day to complete our end of season two survey.

 

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Your feedback is important and will allow us to improve future podcast episodes for

 

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our listeners like yourselves.

 

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Your survey link is bit.ly slash TYFTS survey.

 

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We’ll also include the survey link in our show notes.

 

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Thank you and enjoy the episode.

 

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Hi everyone.

 

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Welcome to season two.

 

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This is Shauna and this is Rosalina and we’re your hosts for Too Young for This Show podcast.

 

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This podcast is not just about boobs, but our journey with cancer.

 

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We are young millennials open about giving you our raw and unfiltered look into our lives.

 

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We are in no way medical professionals nor are we offering medical advice.

 

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Any medical references are cited directly from public websites or form our personal

 

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diagnosis.

 

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Some topics and stories may be triggering to those who are fighting, have fought or

 

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have loved someone with cancer.

 

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Hi everyone.

 

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This is Rosalina.

 

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And this is Shauna.

 

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Welcome back to the Too Young for This Shit podcast.

 

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I can’t believe it’s been six months since we finished radiation.

 

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Yeah, that is actually kind of wild.

 

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I didn’t even think about that.

 

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This past week was my six month mark.

 

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Yeah.

 

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Isn’t that crazy?

 

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It’s kind of crazy just like even just remembering how like burnt my skin was.

 

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Right.

 

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And like having to like slather my arms and aloe and calendula cream and aquaphor and

 

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I mean my caffeine.

 

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I mean just like the 90 creams that I had to like mix onto my skin and then like wrap

 

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myself up with six months ago.

 

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So now I’m just you know using like a regular moisturizer.

 

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Same.

 

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Yeah, it seems like last week.

 

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Right.

 

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But then now we’ve been waiting for this moment of our exchange surgery since we had to wait

 

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six months from radiation.

 

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So I think from the time that I got my expanders to the time I’ll have my implants is about

 

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15, 16 months and 16 months of like just waiting to close the door kind of on this chapter.

 

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I always had it in my head of being you know it was I needed to have my double mastectomy

 

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and then I ended up having an unexpected surgery and then having chemo and radiation and then

 

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like this is like the last check mark on the box of being not done.

 

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You’re never done with this chapter but just like finally complete like be completed is

 

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just like super exciting.

 

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Right.

 

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Let’s just give the listeners just a quick recap of what type of mastectomy surgery we

 

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had 14 to 15 months ago.

 

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Yeah.

 

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I had my double mastectomy March 2nd on 2021.

 

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I had expanders placed once they removed my breast tissue.

 

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They ended up taking more skin on my cancer side than they originally thought.

 

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I ended up having two different size expanders on my non cancer side.

 

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I had a 400 CC expand there and on my cancer side I had a 300 CC.

 

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I knew even before I had positive lymph nodes that I was going to have to like have expanders

 

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place because we need to stretch skin for an implant.

 

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I knew kind of from the jump that I wouldn’t have ever qualified for deep flap surgery

 

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and it seemed very like invasive to me at the time that I didn’t even consider it really.

 

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Once the positive lymph nodes for my double mastectomy came back that I had cancer in

 

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them I already was planned to do chemo but it added radiation onto my treatment plan

 

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which was a blow because I really wanted to have my reconstruction and just like be done.

 

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And obviously when you have radiation like a radio you know radiated skin most plastic

 

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surgeons won’t operate on you until after six months.

 

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They want your skin to heal because that side can be more difficult to place an implant.

 

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That added you know an extra six months on to my reconstruction plan which was you know

 

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a blow but you know it was what it was.

 

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And during that time when they placed the expander, it was under the muscle for you right?

 

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Yes it was funny and you know in my first initial plastic surgeon visit we didn’t even

 

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discuss like over the muscle under the muscle.

 

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It was just we’re gonna place expanders you’re gonna have to stretch your skin to get an

 

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implant in there and I didn’t even know to ask about you know whether it was gonna be

 

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over or under.

 

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And when I woke up I did ask they had to place the expanders under the muscle because my

 

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skin was too thin.

 

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They had to take so much especially like my right side which was the breast that had my

 

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tumor in it.

 

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So unfortunately it had to go under the muscle.

 

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It wasn’t until I think after I had already had them placed you know I started to really

 

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kind of consider if I would want to do over the muscle but my plastic surgeon just kind

 

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of told me it really wasn’t an option for me at this time.

 

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Wow.

 

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Yeah.

 

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What was your reconstruction plan?

 

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You obviously did a different surgery than I did.

 

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Yes so I had a single mastectomy.

 

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Both Shana and I had non nipple sparing so we didn’t have we had to remove our nipple.

 

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Right.

 

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So you said that from the beginning that wasn’t.

 

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I mean it was like I think maybe three weeks before my surgery where my breast surgeon

 

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basically said from looking at the imaging the tumor looks close to your nipple and I

 

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would advise to remove it.

 

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And so that’s when we decided let’s just do it.

 

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But yeah I mean about like three weeks before my actual surgery.

 

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So I had my surgery April 8th of 2021 and I was able to choose whether to do over the

 

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muscle or under the muscle.

 

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The one thing that my plastic surgeon did say because I had cancer on my skin that our

 

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surgeon had to remove that was her only concern as to okay we’ll plan to do over the muscle

 

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because that’s what you asked for but in the case that if the skin is like too tight and

 

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we’re not able to do it we’ll place it under the muscle.

 

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But luckily even removing that small piece of skin on top of my breasts we were still

 

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able to do over the muscle which is what I preferred.

 

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Before we get into our conversations and our plans pre-op with our plastic surgeons I first

 

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want to ask you Shana this question.

 

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Were you fully informed about all of your options?

 

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I wasn’t.

 

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I think I only really knew of two options and that was expanders which would then I

 

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would get an implant and then there was the deflap surgery.

 

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I didn’t know that there was like other different types of flap surgeries at the time.

 

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My initial visit with the plastic surgeon you know I did say like I would if I can maybe

 

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go up a size get that out of this entire experience like that’s like you know something I would

 

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like to do.

 

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I don’t want to be any smaller than I was.

 

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I would like to be bigger if I can.

 

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She heard me but then obviously when she had gone in to place the expanders and had to

 

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place a smaller expander I think that that kind of derailed the original plan that she

 

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had for me of maybe possibly being able to go up a size.

 

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I started getting fills about two weeks after my double mastectomy.

 

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That was my first fill and she had said that we were only going to do two fills and then

 

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we would stop because I would have to do chemo and radiation and then once I was finished

 

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with radiation we would resume the fills to stretch the skin even more.

 

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Once you know I was recovering from surgery and was like trying to figure out like what

 

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do I do now about these two different size expanders she said you know let’s get you

 

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through treatment and then we can always go back in and like replace the expander and

 

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give you a bigger expander.

 

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So in my head I think that that’s what I always thought was going to happen and during chemo

 

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I was filled evenly in both expanders but because I had one that was bigger than the other one

 

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looked fuller and one looked like kind of deflated.

 

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So I spent like the summer of 2021 into the fall of 2021 like just kind of with like two

 

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different size foods.

 

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I don’t know you know reconstructed foods.

 

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You know then I started radiation and I finished radiation November 31st 2021 and they had

 

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said you know give your skin like a good solid month to heal before you head back to the

 

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plastic surgeon.

 

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You can you know resume your fills as soon as like your skin heals a little bit better.

 

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So I think it was after the holidays.

 

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I think it was the first week of January I went like kind of basically like running into

 

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my plastic surgeons like office at that point and being like okay I’m done like let’s get

 

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the show on the road.

 

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You know I knew from the jump that I was going to have to wait six months before she would

 

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operate on me.

 

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So from there we just started to do the fills again.

 

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She over expanded my radiated side which was my 300 cc expander.

 

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She only filled that one time post radiation.

 

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So I was so lopsided, like my skin was like tight and like the expander was over expanded.

 

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So I had like one really rock hard breast that was basically like up into my chin and

 

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then I had like a saggy not expanded breast on the other side when we were going through

 

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the fills.

 

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You know I had said like do I need to have another surgery to have the same size expanders

 

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put in or get different expanders put in like how do we get this to work.

 

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And my plastic surgeon had said she could go in and basically extend the pocket in my

 

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radiated side.

 

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So basically make a bigger pocket to fit a 400 cc size implant in my radiated side or

 

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my other option was to do a flap from my back.

 

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Yep a lot like a LAT right.

 

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Yep yep yep and that would give us more skin to work with and I could do a bigger implant

 

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but she did say that I would need another drain and the second she said drain I was

 

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like we’re not going to mess it up.

 

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You know especially after you know after my second surgery for the lymph node removal

 

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like I had a drain again for that surgery and have plans coming up in June that I like

 

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can’t take more time off from work and I just was like let me just have her extend the pocket

 

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get two size but they just have like two of the same size breasts for now implants for

 

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now and then down the line if I want to have a revision we’ll go from there.

 

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That is my plan.

 

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Yeah have my plastic surgeon go in extend the pocket.

 

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When I had gone in for my pre-op it was at May 10th and we discussed like some options.

 

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So my plastic surgeon only works with Cientra implants which I was fine with.

 

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I originally thought it was going to be mentor.

 

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I don’t know if I just went in so like ready to like schedule surgery and whatever that

 

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I just heard everything wrong.

 

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I felt like I did that when I went in for the pre-op I felt like I was in a different

 

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doctor’s office.

 

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There were so many things that caught me off guard but I think because I just was so eager

 

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to like get it scheduled that I didn’t ask the right questions or I think I just I think

 

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I was just honestly just like too amped up that I just was like it’s going to be fine

 

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let me just schedule it and we’ll figure it out.

 

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Did you look up questions to ask online or did you just like go in to the doctor’s office

 

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and just ask your questions there when the conversations came up?

 

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When it came to like implant size projection I had done research on my own and then I’m

 

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in a breast reconstruction group on Facebook that’s been like kind of a godsend.

 

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It’s like people that are showing their results and like their CC sizes and their body frames.

 

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I was kind of getting like a picture of like what this might look like in my chest based

 

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off of other people’s results.

 

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Like I was looking for women that had expander sizes between 300 and 400 CC that you know

 

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in the same weight and height and like build as me and what their projection types were.

 

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Oh that’s really good information.

 

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Yes yeah you know and I went in and I asked and I kind of said like this is what we’re

 

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looking to do and you know kind of like a little bit about like my expander size and

 

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so that kind of gave me like a little bit of like a really good sense of like what I

 

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wanted them to look like and what I didn’t want them to look like.

 

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Yeah you showed them pictures right?

 

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Oh yeah I went in with all these pictures of these women like screenshot it on my phone

 

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like this is what I want this to look like.

 

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My plastic surgeon is a female she’s young she’s probably only a couple years older than

 

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I am and I think she kind of just like understood like from a from a female perspective of you

 

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know if this was me, how would I want my own breast to look.

 

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I think she just understands as far as what I what it is that I’m looking for.

 

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Another thing that we discussed which like I don’t know what I’m more excited for implants

 

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or this but I’m gonna have a scar revision they’re gonna fix the scar my port scar because

 

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when I got my port taken out in October of 2021 my body is a hard time dissolving sutures

 

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and I still had a stitch like that’s not dissolved from back in October and it just like has

 

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made my port scar like not heal correctly and it just looks like angry and ugly and

 

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00:14:20,760 –> 00:14:25,480

I’m actually like more self-conscious about that scar than I am about like the lobe side

 

207

00:14:25,480 –> 00:14:27,720

of my breasts to be completely honest with you.

 

208

00:14:27,720 –> 00:14:30,200

Like it’s just up higher on your body.

 

209

00:14:30,200 –> 00:14:36,320

Absolutely so that was another thing we discussed that she’s gonna do during my exchange surgery.

 

210

00:14:36,320 –> 00:14:42,720

Did you not feel like you were educated enough or she didn’t educate you on all of your options?

 

211

00:14:42,720 –> 00:14:48,120

I think I kind of went into it being like I trust her you know so I trust her to give

 

212

00:14:48,120 –> 00:14:51,880

me all of the reconstruction options that are gonna work for me.

 

213

00:14:51,880 –> 00:14:58,080

I don’t think that she realized how much was gonna have to be taken from the side that

 

214

00:14:58,080 –> 00:14:59,080

I had massive.

 

215

00:14:59,080 –> 00:15:03,640

It wasn’t until she got in there that she realized the situation because it was bigger

 

216

00:15:03,640 –> 00:15:06,000

than it showed up on in MRI.

 

217

00:15:06,000 –> 00:15:07,000

The tumor itself.

 

218

00:15:07,000 –> 00:15:13,180

Yes they measured it at five centimeters and it was really six you know maybe she had the

 

219

00:15:13,180 –> 00:15:17,160

correct information like from the jump I think she would have presented me those options

 

220

00:15:17,160 –> 00:15:20,120

and I knew I think from the beginning that I wanted implants.

 

221

00:15:20,120 –> 00:15:26,240

I wanted like an easy simple especially after hearing like how extensive like the deep flap

 

222

00:15:26,240 –> 00:15:33,720

surgery is and recovery and like how long it takes and the like it’s just I didn’t especially

 

223

00:15:33,720 –> 00:15:36,920

and you’re going through like a whirlwind especially in the beginning of making all

 

224

00:15:36,920 –> 00:15:43,800

these really big decisions on your surgeries and treatment plans and doctors and you know

 

225

00:15:43,800 –> 00:15:48,600

and then you’re like your initial shock and like in your your own emotions and it’s just

 

226

00:15:48,600 –> 00:15:57,080

like it’s a lot it’s a lot to process all in the beginning and I think adding the surgery

 

227

00:15:57,080 –> 00:16:03,240

like that on top of like what like I couldn’t wrap my head around doing something like that.

 

228

00:16:03,240 –> 00:16:09,800

Absolutely I 100% agree because the other thing that my plastic surgeon mentioned to

 

229

00:16:09,800 –> 00:16:17,480

me is that once you do for example a deep flap you can’t do it again like that’s one

 

230

00:16:17,480 –> 00:16:23,320

time only but you can do that type of surgery so that’s something to really consider as

 

231

00:16:23,320 –> 00:16:24,920

well.

 

232

00:16:24,920 –> 00:16:32,360

My surgery is May 31st so the day after Memorial Day and I’m actually really like looking forward

 

233

00:16:32,360 –> 00:16:35,840

to it I feel like just like ready and like excited for it.

 

234

00:16:35,840 –> 00:16:37,240

I know you’re so pumped.

 

235

00:16:37,240 –> 00:16:40,040

I am I don’t know why I’m this person.

 

236

00:16:40,040 –> 00:16:45,840

There’s no shame like there’s so many women out there that are so pumped for the reconstruction

 

237

00:16:45,840 –> 00:16:51,480

I feel like it just gives them life it gives them some sort of normalcy I think in the

 

238

00:16:51,480 –> 00:17:00,000

sense that like after you complete that surgery then there’s nothing else really like pending

 

239

00:17:00,000 –> 00:17:01,960

for a while I guess.

 

240

00:17:01,960 –> 00:17:02,960

Disclosure for me.

 

241

00:17:02,960 –> 00:17:03,960

Exactly.

 

242

00:17:03,960 –> 00:17:09,160

You had like a totally different experience from me because you didn’t do a double.

 

243

00:17:09,160 –> 00:17:15,320

You did a single so your reconstruction options are different.

 

244

00:17:15,320 –> 00:17:18,640

Did you know that you wanted to do a single from the jump?

 

245

00:17:18,640 –> 00:17:22,080

Like did you know because I walked in being like I don’t even want to talk about when

 

246

00:17:22,080 –> 00:17:23,080

we do a single.

 

247

00:17:23,080 –> 00:17:31,720

Yeah I thought if doing a double was unnecessary then I would rather just do a single mastectomy.

 

248

00:17:31,720 –> 00:17:37,460

That’s just what I like initially what I was thinking of because you know if there was

 

249

00:17:37,460 –> 00:17:44,400

any cancer in the second breast in the beginning of my journey from what I was hearing that

 

250

00:17:44,400 –> 00:17:51,520

like having cancer in the second breast is low risk like you’re at a higher risk of having

 

251

00:17:51,520 –> 00:17:56,380

a recurrence in the same breast than you know in the opposite breast.

 

252

00:17:56,380 –> 00:18:00,320

So that’s why I chose the route to do a single mastectomy.

 

253

00:18:00,320 –> 00:18:07,040

Once I met with my breast surgeon just for a follow up after radiation so it was like

 

254

00:18:07,040 –> 00:18:16,240

a month after my mammogram we had the conversation that for example I’m 29 now but she just used

 

255

00:18:16,240 –> 00:18:24,180

the example as if like when I’m 30 the risk of getting secondary cancer on the other side

 

256

00:18:24,180 –> 00:18:28,940

of the breast is 4% right now.

 

257

00:18:28,940 –> 00:18:38,200

When I’m 80, the risk could be high as 20% and so when I heard that information I freaked

 

258

00:18:38,200 –> 00:18:39,480

out for sure.

 

259

00:18:39,480 –> 00:18:44,760

I freaked out because in the beginning of my journey that there wouldn’t be much of

 

260

00:18:44,760 –> 00:18:46,240

like a high risk.

 

261

00:18:46,240 –> 00:18:51,900

The mentality and the way that I’m thinking about things now is that like well in the

 

262

00:18:51,900 –> 00:18:57,160

future I need to do something about it if I want to prevent a secondary cancer from

 

263

00:18:57,160 –> 00:18:58,640

happening.

 

264

00:18:58,640 –> 00:19:08,720

That was some news for me and during my journey with my plastic surgeon and all the appointments

 

265

00:19:08,720 –> 00:19:14,620

and meeting her I think I met with my plastic surgeon like five or six times to be honest

 

266

00:19:14,620 –> 00:19:21,660

just so the listeners know my surgery is on Monday June 6th but kind of going back to

 

267

00:19:21,660 –> 00:19:24,760

why I met with my plastic surgeon like five or six times.

 

268

00:19:24,760 –> 00:19:33,080

So just like Shana in my first appointment with Dr. Slack my plastic surgeon who also

 

269

00:19:33,080 –> 00:19:40,980

did my tissue expander I trusted her and I thought every information that she was telling

 

270

00:19:40,980 –> 00:19:45,920

me she was choosing the right reconstruction plan for me.

 

271

00:19:45,920 –> 00:19:51,040

My first meeting with my plastic surgeon we talked about the different flap surgeries.

 

272

00:19:51,040 –> 00:19:58,320

We talked about PAP, TUG which is fat from tissue I should say from your thighs.

 

273

00:19:58,320 –> 00:20:01,360

We also talked about LAP flap as well.

 

274

00:20:01,360 –> 00:20:08,760

That was the route that she wanted to take because once your breast is radiated there

 

275

00:20:08,760 –> 00:20:15,720

is a higher risk like a 60% risk from what she told me to have capsular contracture.

 

276

00:20:15,720 –> 00:20:20,160

That could happen at any moment within the 10 years that I have an implant and that could

 

277

00:20:20,160 –> 00:20:23,680

also happen when you have a tissue expander as well.

 

278

00:20:23,680 –> 00:20:27,800

So any foreign object a capsular contracture could happen.

 

279

00:20:27,800 –> 00:20:35,480

So she really wanted to go towards the flap route because it removes that risk and you

 

280

00:20:35,480 –> 00:20:43,120

no I don’t have to have multiple surgeries within my lifetime right but as what Shana

 

281

00:20:43,120 –> 00:20:45,920

was mentioning I didn’t want to go for that route.

 

282

00:20:45,920 –> 00:20:48,400

I think it was just an invasive surgery.

 

283

00:20:48,400 –> 00:20:50,520

I didn’t want any additional scars.

 

284

00:20:50,520 –> 00:20:57,320

I wanted to choose implants because it was less invasive in my opinion and also the recovery

 

285

00:20:57,320 –> 00:21:04,800

period is much smoother I think and quicker than just having a flap surgery.

 

286

00:21:04,800 –> 00:21:07,080

Yeah so basically we talked about that.

 

287

00:21:07,080 –> 00:21:10,340

We talked about saline versus silicone.

 

288

00:21:10,340 –> 00:21:19,080

So I was leaning more towards saline because I wanted to be careful of any rupture that

 

289

00:21:19,080 –> 00:21:26,560

happens inside my body and it’s easier to detect because once saline ruptures it leaks

 

290

00:21:26,560 –> 00:21:32,920

out from the shell and it just absorbs in your body so you can easily tell when you

 

291

00:21:32,920 –> 00:21:38,280

don’t have a boob anymore on that side versus like a silicone.

 

292

00:21:38,280 –> 00:21:39,280

You’re deflated.

 

293

00:21:39,280 –> 00:21:46,480

Yeah exactly you’re deflated right but with the silicone you know it’s difficult to detect

 

294

00:21:46,480 –> 00:21:54,740

but with the FDA they recommend you know every patient who has an implant in their body whether

 

295

00:21:54,740 –> 00:22:02,360

it’s breast reconstruction or breast augmentation recommended to do an MRI or an ultrasound actually

 

296

00:22:02,360 –> 00:22:09,080

to check any leakage and I think it’s like three years after having the implant placed.

 

297

00:22:09,080 –> 00:22:14,800

When we talked about saline she did not recommend going that route because the rippling and

 

298

00:22:14,800 –> 00:22:16,880

she was more focused on the aesthetics.

 

299

00:22:16,880 –> 00:22:21,720

We would have to do fat grafting just to inject more fat.

 

300

00:22:21,720 –> 00:22:26,360

Injecting that into my breast so it could form a thicker skin.

 

301

00:22:26,360 –> 00:22:27,640

Fill in the ripples.

 

302

00:22:27,640 –> 00:22:34,200

We also talked about the type of implant so I was asking her like I was leaning more towards

 

303

00:22:34,200 –> 00:22:43,040

saline but even if I chose saline or silicone like what type of implant were you recommending

 

304

00:22:43,040 –> 00:22:48,560

in terms of shape and so she was recommending the round shape.

 

305

00:22:48,560 –> 00:22:56,000

In terms of like my body shape it just wouldn’t project it so much where the teardrop shape

 

306

00:22:56,000 –> 00:22:59,440

had like more volume and more projection and I didn’t want that.

 

307

00:22:59,440 –> 00:23:02,640

I wanted something more natural fitting for me.

 

308

00:23:02,640 –> 00:23:09,680

She was also letting me know about the five different sizes of projection so there’s low,

 

309

00:23:09,680 –> 00:23:17,720

low plus, moderate, full and extra full so that was really nice I think for her to mention

 

310

00:23:17,720 –> 00:23:24,300

that because then she was giving me the option of if you’re not happy with how your expander

 

311

00:23:24,300 –> 00:23:29,160

looks right now we could you know project it more just give it more shape.

 

312

00:23:29,160 –> 00:23:37,720

I didn’t want it to be like so huge you know I loved the way that my breasts looked before

 

313

00:23:37,720 –> 00:23:44,200

cancer and I wanted to keep it that way so I basically was just saying can you just mimic

 

314

00:23:44,200 –> 00:23:50,080

the right side because like you know I that’s the healthy side and you can just match it

 

315

00:23:50,080 –> 00:23:52,120

to that same exact way.

 

316

00:23:52,120 –> 00:23:54,160

Right you want to get back to that.

 

317

00:23:54,160 –> 00:23:55,160

Yeah exactly.

 

318

00:23:55,160 –> 00:23:58,440

We’ve also talked about symmetry.

 

319

00:23:58,440 –> 00:24:07,800

Now you know I had a single mastectomy and so with an implant it’s harder to get the

 

320

00:24:07,800 –> 00:24:13,840

reconstructive side to match the other side of the breast but with the flap it’s easier

 

321

00:24:13,840 –> 00:24:16,960

for her to match the symmetry.

 

322

00:24:16,960 –> 00:24:23,960

However because I did not again wanted to do flap she was recommending for me to do

 

323

00:24:23,960 –> 00:24:30,320

a breast augmentation on the right side so adding in a small implant on the right side

 

324

00:24:30,320 –> 00:24:36,320

and at first you know I said okay that’s fine whatever I just want to do one surgery and

 

325

00:24:36,320 –> 00:24:43,440

that’s it but because in the beginning of what I mentioned that when I when I met with

 

326

00:24:43,440 –> 00:24:50,120

Dr. Baker so I met with Dr. Baker after meeting Dr. Slack in the beginning of this year she

 

327

00:24:50,120 –> 00:24:56,920

was telling me about the secondary cancer I just said okay now I’m kind of confused.

 

328

00:24:56,920 –> 00:25:02,320

I really did reconsider you know removing the breast tissue on the right side and even

 

329

00:25:02,320 –> 00:25:08,600

my boyfriend after I told him about the secondary cancer he was pretty concerned and he was

 

330

00:25:08,600 –> 00:25:14,480

basically just telling me like like your left breast tried to kill you.

 

331

00:25:14,480 –> 00:25:21,080

Don’t you want to remove that risk at all cost and we kind of determined you know for

 

332

00:25:21,080 –> 00:25:31,000

me I have an attachment to my right breast and I know like facts versus emotions like

 

333

00:25:31,000 –> 00:25:37,720

I shouldn’t compare both of them but you know this is my life and this is my choice and

 

334

00:25:37,720 –> 00:25:47,200

for right now I don’t want to remove the right breast I feel like I went through so much

 

335

00:25:47,200 –> 00:25:54,440

dramatically that if I were to remove the right breast I feel maybe like out of place

 

336

00:25:54,440 –> 00:25:58,160

I’m just not mentally prepared to do that.

 

337

00:25:58,160 –> 00:26:01,880

Honestly like that’s your sense of control in a situation like you know we didn’t have

 

338

00:26:01,880 –> 00:26:10,560

control over having cancer at 28 and 32 like you just went through having to reconstruct

 

339

00:26:10,560 –> 00:26:16,400

your left side and like knowing what that entailed basically going over and restarting

 

340

00:26:16,400 –> 00:26:21,880

that all over again on your right side just sounds like that’s not something I would want

 

341

00:26:21,880 –> 00:26:29,120

to either you know like I like you know coming from like a like a mental standpoint of like

 

342

00:26:29,120 –> 00:26:30,120

we’re starting over.

 

343

00:26:30,120 –> 00:26:35,640

Oh yeah absolutely I don’t know if I’d want to do that either and I think part of me is

 

344

00:26:35,640 –> 00:26:40,560

why I went the route that I did because I just was like I just knew I just like know

 

345

00:26:40,560 –> 00:26:44,880

myself and I just know after going through it all it would be like traumatizing to do

 

346

00:26:44,880 –> 00:26:45,880

the other side.

 

347

00:26:45,880 –> 00:26:46,880

Yep.

 

348

00:26:46,880 –> 00:26:47,880

Yeah.

 

349

00:26:47,880 –> 00:26:53,760

The other thing you know I think about the future a lot and you know I was talking to

 

350

00:26:53,760 –> 00:27:00,600

my plastic surgeon and we were having a conversation of like you know in the future like five or

 

351

00:27:00,600 –> 00:27:08,240

ten years from now like if I decide to do a flap surgery then that could be the opportunity

 

352

00:27:08,240 –> 00:27:16,160

that I do it for both sides of my breasts you know as I mentioned before you can only

 

353

00:27:16,160 –> 00:27:23,480

do flap surgery once so I’d rather do it at the time that I could reconstruct both breasts

 

354

00:27:23,480 –> 00:27:25,400

if I decide to do that.

 

355

00:27:25,400 –> 00:27:26,400

Absolutely.

 

356

00:27:26,400 –> 00:27:27,400

Yeah.

 

357

00:27:27,400 –> 00:27:34,000

I mean you know as I mentioned like I met with my plastic surgeon like five or six times

 

358

00:27:34,000 –> 00:27:40,040

and this happened to me in the beginning of my journey too with the tissue expander.

 

359

00:27:40,040 –> 00:27:47,000

I sometimes have to like hear the information over and over again and especially with like

 

360

00:27:47,000 –> 00:27:57,840

new terminologies also making sure that I’m okay with what she’s suggesting as well.

 

361

00:27:57,840 –> 00:28:04,480

After meeting with Dr. Baker that’s when like all hell broke loose essentially and I had

 

362

00:28:04,480 –> 00:28:10,200

like a really hard time like not really trusting her because that wasn’t the case but like

 

363

00:28:10,200 –> 00:28:16,520

I needed to trust myself that I knew exactly what was going on I knew exactly what surgery

 

364

00:28:16,520 –> 00:28:24,200

we’re going to do I knew exactly like every option that I had like I even I was asking

 

365

00:28:24,200 –> 00:28:30,880

her about like a hybrid reconstruction which is basically like you do half flap and half

 

366

00:28:30,880 –> 00:28:37,400

implant and I was like okay well you didn’t tell me about this so can you do this you

 

367

00:28:37,400 –> 00:28:38,400

know.

 

368

00:28:38,400 –> 00:28:39,400

Yeah I didn’t know that was a thing.

 

369

00:28:39,400 –> 00:28:42,080

Yeah I read it online totally read it online.

 

370

00:28:42,080 –> 00:28:48,480

My plastic surgeon is essentially giving me the information that she thinks would be best

 

371

00:28:48,480 –> 00:28:59,200

aesthetically for me but I needed to know that it would be okay health wise for me in

 

372

00:28:59,200 –> 00:29:00,720

the next 10 years.

 

373

00:29:00,720 –> 00:29:07,920

When she first mentioned oh I’m going to use allergen implants and she gave me the pamphlet

 

374

00:29:07,920 –> 00:29:14,280

that I needed to sign and I needed to read and I needed to know all my risk.

 

375

00:29:14,280 –> 00:29:20,480

One of the things that were on there was that the implants are manufactured contain heavy

 

376

00:29:20,480 –> 00:29:28,160

metals like some of the implants contain heavy metals because of that I freaked out and I

 

377

00:29:28,160 –> 00:29:30,960

did extensive research.

 

378

00:29:30,960 –> 00:29:39,080

I looked into every manufacturer’s website their brochures I read their like scientific

 

379

00:29:39,080 –> 00:29:45,200

fine print I looked at their graphs I looked at their table that mentioned the heavy metals

 

380

00:29:45,200 –> 00:29:49,640

I even asked my naturopathic doctor is this safe.

 

381

00:29:49,640 –> 00:29:56,920

Essentially I chose Cientra the implant and I just really loved their brochures I felt

 

382

00:29:56,920 –> 00:30:04,880

like more informative and I felt that they were showcasing more information than per

 

383

00:30:04,880 –> 00:30:06,960

se mentor or allergen.

 

384

00:30:06,960 –> 00:30:14,200

I felt like for those two sites I had to like really surf the web to get more information

 

385

00:30:14,200 –> 00:30:17,240

that I got from Cientra.

 

386

00:30:17,240 –> 00:30:23,680

The other thing that you know I read and maybe this is for like breast augmentation because

 

387

00:30:23,680 –> 00:30:30,720

they don’t really say what they got their numbers from or like who but basically from

 

388

00:30:30,720 –> 00:30:37,280

what I read online is that their implants showcase that they had low percentage of capsular

 

389

00:30:37,280 –> 00:30:44,360

contracture low percentage of rupture rate supposedly mentor has the highest.

 

390

00:30:44,360 –> 00:30:54,800

The other thing Cientra basically only provides their implants to certified board plastic

 

391

00:30:54,800 –> 00:30:56,680

surgeons.

 

392

00:30:56,680 –> 00:31:02,340

So how are you how are you feeling now leading up to your surgery?

 

393

00:31:02,340 –> 00:31:11,360

Over the past I would say like three weeks I was definitely overwhelmed distressed I

 

394

00:31:11,360 –> 00:31:18,540

I think I kind of got a little depressed and I was like crying like most of the time.

 

395

00:31:18,540 –> 00:31:24,560

It wasn’t until like yesterday that I stopped crying just wanted to make sure that you know

 

396

00:31:24,560 –> 00:31:32,680

that I chose something that would benefit me and it wouldn’t cause like complications

 

397

00:31:32,680 –> 00:31:39,040

for my body and there’s just so many factors that need to like consider.

 

398

00:31:39,040 –> 00:31:45,120

For you Shana like I’m so happy that this is like closure for you for sure I just for

 

399

00:31:45,120 –> 00:31:51,040

me it doesn’t feel like closure because breast implants is not a lifetime device.

 

400

00:31:51,040 –> 00:31:58,800

For me I am worried about the potential risk the potential complications you know now in

 

401

00:31:58,800 –> 00:32:04,680

the back of my mind I have to think about you know, potentially removing the right breast.

 

402

00:32:04,680 –> 00:32:11,600

The other thing actually from my fertility genetic testing they found that I tested positive

 

403

00:32:11,600 –> 00:32:18,440

for factor V liadone I think it’s called which increases the chance of clumps of blood

 

404

00:32:18,440 –> 00:32:25,680

clocks and that’s hereditary and that could either come from my father or mother but that’s

 

405

00:32:25,680 –> 00:32:31,800

something that they found out after I had my mastectomy surgery which thanks fucking

 

406

00:32:31,800 –> 00:32:36,960

god I didn’t have complications but now that’s in the back of my mind as well that you know

 

407

00:32:36,960 –> 00:32:42,760

I have this like gene that no one knew about until I actually had the test so you know

 

408

00:32:42,760 –> 00:32:47,880

that’s another thing that I that I get worried about but just to answer your question I think

 

409

00:32:47,880 –> 00:32:51,400

I feel more mentally prepared.

 

410

00:32:51,400 –> 00:32:55,800

I mean I had to weigh all the same things like is this safe to put my body is this safe

 

411

00:32:55,800 –> 00:33:02,920

long term and it’s my making the right choice and like leading up to my surgery like I’m

 

412

00:33:02,920 –> 00:33:07,920

ready for this let’s do this type of mindset where normally I’m like thinking I think right

 

413

00:33:07,920 –> 00:33:13,120

steps ahead like I’m like this could happen this could happen and to mentally prepare

 

414

00:33:13,120 –> 00:33:16,960

myself for everything that could possibly ever go wrong that’s who I am as a person

 

415

00:33:16,960 –> 00:33:22,360

I’ve been like this pain and in this situation I’m not navigating life post cancer and just

 

416

00:33:22,360 –> 00:33:29,720

like me really being so conscious of keeping my stress levels down it’s like important

 

417

00:33:29,720 –> 00:33:36,160

for me to like I’m really I’m doing this in therapy of just trying to really like listen

 

418

00:33:36,160 –> 00:33:42,040

if and when the time comes we’ll cross that bridge but for right now I can’t drive myself

 

419

00:33:42,040 –> 00:33:47,680

insane thinking of like what if you know my dad got it really in my head like it’s like

 

420

00:33:47,680 –> 00:33:51,640

oh you know what I had to kind of said to my dad’s very anxious and I had said to him

 

421

00:33:51,640 –> 00:33:57,720

like you know they’re gonna go in and they’re gonna see like inside of like you know the

 

422

00:33:57,720 –> 00:34:02,480

pockets like if there’s anything that they see that biopsied immediately like to kind

 

423

00:34:02,480 –> 00:34:06,840

of make him feel like a little bit better and like my dad like kind of like he got like

 

424

00:34:06,840 –> 00:34:10,520

really weird about it and then like started asking all these questions and I was just

 

425

00:34:10,520 –> 00:34:17,480

like not I don’t think I was giving him this like concerned reaction that he was expecting

 

426

00:34:17,480 –> 00:34:22,680

could possibly be something like and you don’t seem concerned and it’s it’s not that it’s

 

427

00:34:22,680 –> 00:34:29,240

just the stress levels that I’m trying to control in my body right now kind of being

 

428

00:34:29,240 –> 00:34:34,560

in remission or you know never having no evidence of disease like I don’t want this to come

 

429

00:34:34,560 –> 00:34:39,480

back so I always am just trying to like especially now and this is not like me I’m that person

 

430

00:34:39,480 –> 00:34:44,000

that’s just always freaking out about like what if this what if that I mean like there’s

 

431

00:34:44,000 –> 00:34:48,680

complications to everything like I had to kind of say that to my dad is like I get in

 

432

00:34:48,680 –> 00:34:53,200

a car every day or you get into you know or like I walk on the streets in New York I can

 

433

00:34:53,200 –> 00:34:58,680

get by a car at any moment like anything could possibly happen at any given second I cannot

 

434

00:34:58,680 –> 00:35:04,760

sit here and obsess and like think of everything that could possibly happen and I know like

 

435

00:35:04,760 –> 00:35:09,800

the best thing I can do is like be educated and be like these are the the risks and like

 

436

00:35:09,800 –> 00:35:13,640

this is everything I can do to like hopefully prevent this from happening and stay on top

 

437

00:35:13,640 –> 00:35:20,320

of this and and just like really kind of kind of I need to like I think for myself just

 

438

00:35:20,320 –> 00:35:25,680

need to like move forward in a place where I just I need to yeah I think stress is what

 

439

00:35:25,680 –> 00:35:34,080

got me to this point and now I need to try to like dial it I’m proud of you I mean this

 

440

00:35:34,080 –> 00:35:38,840

I like I said I said to my therapist like this is not who I am as a person so like for

 

441

00:35:38,840 –> 00:35:44,240

me she’s trying to get me yeah to be to like think you know think like a little bit and

 

442

00:35:44,240 –> 00:35:48,200

I and it that’s thing it’s like is it isn’t me I don’t want to say it’s not a care it

 

443

00:35:48,200 –> 00:35:51,740

doesn’t come from like a care of this place of like I get like oh I’m like just like so

 

444

00:35:51,740 –> 00:35:55,040

pumped to get my implants that like I’m not even thinking of like anything else.

 

445

00:35:55,040 –> 00:36:00,600

The two I think almost losing my extender to that infection that was so out of my control

 

446

00:36:00,600 –> 00:36:06,640

and I just like that was such a stressor and I think just like now that my hormones are

 

447

00:36:06,640 –> 00:36:11,920

kind of coming back as I’m off all the hormone meds and things right now like I just I need

 

448

00:36:11,920 –> 00:36:16,840

to be like a little bit extra cautious about keeping those levels under control so like

 

449

00:36:16,840 –> 00:36:22,720

this entire experience is just like they’re not like minor decisions every every little

 

450

00:36:22,720 –> 00:36:31,400

decision to me worrying and me being I know psychotic I say with all this information

 

451

00:36:31,400 –> 00:36:38,080

that tried to be in control I didn’t I don’t want to deter anyone from you know getting

 

452

00:36:38,080 –> 00:36:43,400

the reconstruction because it should be a happy moment right like what we mentioned

 

453

00:36:43,400 –> 00:36:51,720

the beginning it’s closure you should be a static I think what really had me concerned

 

454

00:36:51,720 –> 00:37:00,400

was just do I have all the information that was given to me my fear was being blindsided

 

455

00:37:00,400 –> 00:37:04,040

I didn’t want that to happen.

 

456

00:37:04,040 –> 00:37:14,240

We are gonna keep you guys posted on our surgeries and how we feel about our results and navigating

 

457

00:37:14,240 –> 00:37:19,280

all like the surgery post surgery appointments and things like that.

 

458

00:37:19,280 –> 00:37:23,600

Thank you all for listening and supporting our podcast.

 

459

00:37:23,600 –> 00:37:28,800

Sharing our stories with you has been incredibly healing for both of us and we hope it helps

 

460

00:37:28,800 –> 00:37:31,840

other women in their journeys through breast cancer.

 

461

00:37:31,840 –> 00:37:36,680

Ladies if you enjoyed this episode, please share it with your friends and fellow breasties.

 

462

00:37:36,680 –> 00:37:41,560

Help us reach more women by subscribing and rating us on Apple podcast, Spotify and now

 

463

00:37:41,560 –> 00:37:42,560

on YouTube.

 

464

00:37:42,560 –> 00:37:50,700

You can follow us on Instagram at tyftspodcast and email us at tyftspodcast at gmail.com.

 

465

00:37:50,700 –> 00:37:53,200

We love hearing from you guys so shoot us a message.

 

466

00:37:53,200 –> 00:37:59,240

We will link any resources from the episode in our show notes.